Well it's been a while since I've blogged about anything, I simply haven't felt the need to share anything. However, just recently my brother Kristian and I co-wrote a song called "This too shall pass". I feel a real deep connection to this song as part of it is pretty much my whole life philosophy, and I also drew on a lot of real life experience for the lyrics. Hopefully we can get it recorded soon so I can post up the audio but until then here are the lyrics:

THIS TOO SHALL PASS

VERSE I

HE DIDN'T UNDERSTAND RECESSION TILL HIS HOME WAS WHERE IT NESTED
FINDIN' OUT WHAT THE MEANING OF THE WORD DEPRESSION IS
INCESSANT NEED TO TELL HIMSELF THAT EVERYTHING IS OK
MEANWHILE HIS WIFE AND KIDS ARE THINKIN' THAT THERE'S NO WAY
THE MONEY THAT HE SAVED AND THE UNEMPLOYMENT CHECK SUMS
ARE GONNA BE ENOUGH TO CARRY THEM THROUGH INTO NEXT MONTH
SO NOW IT'S CUTBACKS THE LIFESTYLE HAS TO CHANGE
THE BILLS WILL GET PAID IF SOME OTHERS GET REARRANGED
HIS WIFE THINKS ITS STRANGE THAT HE STAYS SO POSITIVE
BUT ALL HE SEEMS TO SAY TO HER IS BABY HEY WE GOTTA LIVE
THE OFF BRAND FOOD DOESN'T REALLY TASTE THAT BAD
BESIDES GROWING UP THIS IS STILL MORE THAN WE HAD
PLEASE DON'T BE MAD DON'T GET SAD WE'LL MAKE IT THROUGH
I PROMISE YOU AND SHE BELIEVED HIM 'CAUSE SHE KNEW HE WAS AN HONEST DUDE
HER ATTITUDE INSIDE WAS A SOMBER ONE AT NIGHT
SO HE HOLDS HER IN THE BED AND HE TELLS HER AS SHE CRIES

CHORUS

ONE DAY....THIS TOO SHALL PASS AWAY
THINGS CHANGE....NOTHING CAN STAY THE SAME

VERSE II

FLASH FORWARD SIX MONTHS NO LUCK AND TIMES ARE GETTIN' TOUGH
CAN'T FIND A JOB AND THIS ECONOMY AIN'T LETTIN' UP
REGRESSION OF POSSESSIONS NO INTENTION LEFT OF HAVIN' STUFF
NO LONGER SACRIFICE NOW THEY SIMPLY JUST DON'T HAVE ENOUGH
AND TOUGH AS HE WAS HE COULD FEEL HIMSELF BREAKIN' DOWN
ONCE CALM AND COOL NOTICES HIS HANDS ARE SHAKIN' NOW
FROM OWNING TO RENTING TO WANTING DOWN TO BOTTOM GROUND
SCREAMIN' TO HIMSELF AS HE'S FIGHTING TRYING NOT TO DROWN
WHY ME WHY DOES THIS WORLD DESPISE ME
NO TEARS LEFT TO CRY I WANNA DIE FROM WHAT THESE EYES SEE
I'M TRYING BUT IT'S NOT ENOUGH TO GET ME BY
I CAN'T AFFORD THE PILLS THAT KEEP ME FROM THE THOUGHT OF SUICIDE
IF I DIE THE WIFE AND KIDS COULD MOVE ON
NO STRESS OF PLACIN' BETS I KNOW I'M GONNA LOSE ON
I'D PUT THE NOOSE ON, BUT I KNOW THAT IT WOULD HURT THE KIDS
BUT THEN AGAIN i KNOW THAT IT WOULD SHOW THEM THAT THE LESSON IS

CHORUS

ONE DAY....THIS TOO SHALL PASS AWAY
THINGS CHANGE....NOTHING CAN STAY THE SAME


VERSE III

ANOTHER SIX MONTHS A CALL BACK OUT OF THE BLUE
SO USE TO LET DOWNS IT WAS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE
BUT A GUY THAT HE KNEW TOLD HIM THAT HE KNEW A GUY
THAT KNEW A GUY THAT KNOWS A GUY THAT COULD USE A GUY LIKE YOU
HE MADE IT THROUGH, NO MORE SHAME TO TIE HIS NAME TO
MORE THAN HE EVER MADE, DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO INTERVIEW
AND JUST LIKE THAT, THE GOOD LIFE THAT HE KNEW BEFORE
WAS BACK AND HEY IN FACT, INSTEAD OF LACK NOW HE WAS MAKIN' MORE
AND ALL THAT HE WAS FIGHTING FOR WAS NOTHIN' BUT AN AFTERTHOUGHT
THE KIDS FORGOT, NO LESSON TAUGHT JUST LOVE FOR ALL THE STUFF HE BOUGHT
THE AMERICAN DREAM BACK TO BURSTING AT THE SEAMS
UNTIL HIS WIFE RECEIVED THE CALL THAT BROUGHT THE FAMILY TO THEIR KNEES
THEY SAID THAT HER DISEASE WAS TOO ADVANCED TO TRY TO TREAT
THE PAIN TURNED TO DESPAIR, DESPAIR TURNED TO DEFEAT
FROM GOOD TIMES TO SAD GOODBYE'S, HE NEVER THOUGHT THAT HE WOULD SEE THE DAY
HE SAID TO HER BUT REALIZED AS HE WATCHED HER SLIP AWAY

Designer brand manipulation

Take a look at what you're wearing today, is any of it brand specific? Does it fit social standards of any kind? Why did you pick it? is it fashion sense or is it mental conditioning? Now before you all put on your tinfoil hats and call it conspiracy, just think about advertising and how it is used in the modern world. To give a great example of what I'm talking about take this quote from Edward Bernays, the supposed "father" of public relations, wrote in his book "Propaganda", "The conscious and intelligent manipulation of the organized habits and opinions of the masses is an important element in democratic society. Those who manipulate this unseen mechanism of society constitute an invisible government which is the true ruling power of our country. ... We are governed, our minds are molded, our tastes formed, our ideas suggested, largely by men we have never heard of. This is a logical result of the way in which our democratic society is organized. Vast numbers of human beings must cooperate in this manner if they are to live together as a smoothly functioning society. ... In almost every act of our daily lives, whether in the sphere of politics or business, in our social conduct or our ethical thinking, we are dominated by the relatively small number of persons ... who understand the mental processes and social patterns of the masses. It is they who pull the wires which control the public mind." Now bear in mind that Mr. Bernays was the beloved nephew of Mr. Psychoanalysis himself Sigmund Freud, and he adopted many of his uncles principles in his execution of these theories that to control the individual, you must control the masses. Think for a moment about the subconscious mind and how little most people understand about their own. The problem with that is there are people who make a living understanding it and are using it to control our habits of consumption and interaction. Now again I'm not talking about "the powers that be" or mystic cults. I am talking about government officials and large corporations. Is it really absurd to think that they would use this power of persuasion for monetary gain and political power? When will we realize that capabilities such as this, which can be used for more than harmless advertising, are being used to make us feel and act a certain way? So I'm not asking anyone to take up arms and rally in the streets,(although that would be nice), I am simply saying next time you reach for that designer pair of jeans, or light up your favorite brand of cigarette, ask yourself why? Next time you "rock the vote" or watch the news, ask yourself, Why? Stop swallowing what they are feeding us, and think for yourself. I know you think that you already are, but hey.........That's what they want you to think.

Economic downfall and the shit grin on my face!

So I guess everyone is starting to wake up to the impending doom of our comfotable little existence we have grown so fond of in the last 50 odd years. Well as the title of this post might hint I cannot wait for it all to come crashing down. I find it incredibly comical that people are shocked by all these current events. What else did we think would happen when they decided to take all of our industry and outsource it to third world countries. Now don't get me wrong I like paying 30 bucks for a plasma screen tv as much as the next guy, but is it really worth it to exploit some Chinese community for the price cut. I am sickened by the fact that I am part of this mass consumerism movement that feeds the coffers of these corporate giants, While we rape and pilliage the rest of the world for the next hot tech item. When did a private jet and s-class sedan become more important than human life? Now I'm no tree hugging, pot smoking, peace and love preaching hippie, but I do have a thing called compassion. Due to my lack of belief in some egotistic existence of an afterlife I find this life experience to be a precious thing. And I hate to think that I aid the practice of revoking others rights to a meaningful existence so that mine can be more comfortable. So I say let the auto industry fail, Let the economy collapse! Maybe when the cable shuts of and the power cuts out to the video games people will open their fucking eyes and see what has become of this world we live in. So I am asking you if you are reading this right now, Start asking questions and looking for answers instead of counting on the next billion dollar bailout to facilitate your ignorant consumption. We have lived in the dark for far too long, Stand up and take control of your future.....

Still haven't figured it out.....

The walls are closing in around me, there's no way I'll let them get me now,
But it's hard to hold them up, When everyone around me let me down.
So I try to pick up the pieces, With a world of burden on my back,
But a rattled brain and chest pains, Indicate to brace for heart attack.
Is the danger an internal one?...Will that final fleeting breath,
Be a death from natural causes? Or a natural cause of death.
Is this life I chose the lonely road, Paved with rage to warm the cold?
Or is there one with hands to mold this desperate man, whos' soul I sold?
Is this life a life worth living? When my only sight is seen in red?
Is it better to sleep alone at night, or have a corpse inside my bed?
"Who knows", I tell myself, As I struggle toward the edge......
You never know how hard you'll hit the ground, Until you leave the ledge.

Who am I?

thought I would start blogging some rants, poems, and random thoughts for your enjoyment. here is my first of most likely many poems:

I am a worthless wreck with nothing to offer except everything you could ever imagine. A simple man, more complex than you will ever know. I am capable of such a love to fill any heart, and such a rage to blacken the same. I am the knight in shining armor that will reluctantly feed you to the dragon but slay him in the end. I am a walking contradiction. Torn between chaotic serenity, and peaceful insanity. A complete stranger with a strange sense of familiarity, enough to find my way into your heart and call it my home long enough to ruin any chance of future inhabitants. So open the door I think I might stay a while. Who am I you ask..........That's a good question.